Saturday, November 29, 2008

Friday, November 14, 2008

Grab the Nearest Book

Book meme:

Grab the nearest book.
- Open it to page 56.
- Find the fifth sentence.
- Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
- Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST.

So here goes:

Today, each of the seven continents is still lined with classic overland routes.
- A Year of Adventures: A Guide to What, Where and When to do it.
via Meem.

put on a suit

so i waited for a week only to be rejected, rather unceremoniously. failure, rejection part and parcel of life yada yada yada. but it's okay, at least the person who got the job is really good, you know. else i would feel really sucky :D so i told my dear opinionated cousin and mum, both reacted similarly. i doubt it, but apparently it is hard to ignore. if all else fails sings yori, i could put on a suit and look just like one of you. well, i am organized to be an assistant of some sort, so that could work. keep my options open, you know ;)

on another note, i just send another cousin off to cairo. at this rate, i'll probably be cousin-less at the end of the year.

Video mode, silly from Fika Hamidon on Vimeo.

second last haul for school. then Burden will be on holiday mode till next term starts, which is not till after new year.

Sunday, November 9, 2008


i took printmaking class as an elective subject during my foundation year, which was nearly two years ago. i seriously think foundation year is the best time for me. there was this whole adapting issues but i genuinely enjoyed learning very much. it is so much fun. everything was practically new and interesting to me. time flies really fast, then suddenly you're expected to know everything. i'm not ready yet. i still want to learn, learning takes time. i don't want to be competitive right now; it is physically, mentally and emotionally draining.

i named this piece amy because i took amy search as a reference picture. i am not a fan but he had this really cool look on his face for that particular picture. it has this sad blue tinge but his eyes sparkle. also, he was on the magazine that i could bear to tear off the page. so i will have a soft spot for amy from now on cos he was one of my first few prints inspiration.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

inspired by ninishasha

november seventh, two thousand and eight (also happened to be last day of semester one of third year).

woke up at four thirty-ish in the morning, realised that accidentally slept while doing my work, thank Allah that i did not kick my mac, placed the said mac on the table next to my bed, replied my friend's text message, stayed awake for what seems like few solid minutes thinking about what i should do when i wake up later since i have not finish my work for printing and for friday's class.

slept again. woke up to my sister's annoying alarm clock this time, noticed it was after fajr prayer, wait for a while, saw parents in the living room sleeping, brush teeth, took abolution, prayed fajr, continue with work till around ten, ate raya cookies (eww right?) in between, drank HL chocolate milk, chewed ice cubes, showered, got dressed, talked to mum, talked to auntie who was on the phone with mum, salam-ed my mum, contemplating whether to bring umbrella, tried few shoes before settling with the new boots, took the bus, reply text messages and ate famous amos chocolate chip cookies while in the bus, alight at safra, took another bus to school, thankful that it was the double decker bus and picked my favourite seat on the left side of the bus, continue with text messaging, smiled at a guy that looks like my friend, looked out the window and keeping a mental reminder about the scenery for later photo shoot with shaz, thinking about missing today's "lesson".

told myself whatever happens are okay and beyond our control when it suddenly pour, regret not bringing umbrella, arrived at school's busstop, noticed the friend-look-alike also alight at the same busstop, tapped ez-link card and
noticed card value was S$6plus, brisk walked to school despite the rain, smsed my friends, annoyed nobody replied, tried calling, enter printing shop, qued for five minutes and gave up, took lift to level two of school's wing A, was suppose to meet De but she went out for lunch, annoyed at self, asked K for help, jammed the printer, happy that work is printed, arranged work in a file.

hurried to simlim to meet friend, bumped into gab who was smoking infront of cheers, recci few shops for video cam, whine a little how unprepared i was for the interview later, showed friend to mosque, went student lounge to continue arranging work in file, sat close to two strangers talking about who to invite for her party of some sort, finished arranging work but realised haven't print resume, went to toilet, find corner to pray, went to second level again, met De for moral support, print resume, very optimistic and happy at that point of time, bumped into friend who happened to skip that day's class as well, imagining how the class look like with nobody, rushed to taxi stand, bumped into very cute crush in school, happy (to see cute crush and) that the taxi stand was empty, enter old taxi, sad that have no choice but to board the old taxi (old taxi makes me dizzy, it feels so light and floaty), uncle taxi was so very nice and polite and helpful, talked to uncle taxi until reached destination, uncle taxi wished me luck for interview, uncle taxi only took S$9, alight taxi, smiled and wished uncle taxi a good day.

visually imagining myself go there for work, feel a bit sad, enter building, ask receptionist about interview to no avail, annoyed at receptionist who dilly dally to attend to me, sat on a comfy couch before gathering the nerve to call interviewee, browse through few magazines and periodicals, got a bit excited, answered a call from cousin, ate orange flavoured clorex, called interviewee, read harper's bazaar, interviewee came, being told that i pronouced interviewee's name wrongly, directed to another part of the lobby (loads of bookshelves with books), shoke hands, start showing and talking about work (felt like boasting), being told that work starts exactly 8.15 till 6.03, finished interview and felt happy (and concerned).

followed instict finding the busstop, sweat like hell, convinced that paya lebar area is the hottest area in the whole of singapore, took bus to aunt's office, happy that there is a straight bus home, reached aunt's office and happy to see cousin Y, cousin A, h, cousin S, and others, talked and helped a little bit, lunch at arnold's with cousin Y, cousin A, h, and two other good boys, happy and full, fiddle around and highly impressed with friend's HD video cam, went back office, prayed asr, helped with some typings, install photoshop on the computers, teach cousin how to use photoshop, prayed maghrib.

cousin Y showed puncture marks in car seat, cousin Y drove cousin A and i home, went for a car wash first, carwash person smiled four times, answered a call from mum, got scold for forgetting to run an errand but later saved by my cousin Y, arrived home, chat with dad sister and cousin A, checked emails and usual blogs and sites, disappointed with few rejection emails, mum kissed before leaving for her weekend trip, chat with cousin A again, ate dinner while channel surf telly, annoyed nothing good on telly, sister shared story about bus customer being kicked out of bus and was left in the middle of the expressway, amused with ridiculousness, prayed, showered and changed, and "slept".

woke at twelve thirty a.m. as cousin Y called, cousin A, sister and i got dressed, cousin Y picked us up at one, rants and rants in the car, reached destination and wait for friend J's bus from malaysia.

all five of us to downtown east for a movie, surprised that some people watch madagascar at nearly two in the morning, bought tickets for quatum of solace, mochas, tea, and sweet popcorns (which turned out to be a big mistake because the sugar make us more awake than ever), enjoyed movie very much, thought daniel craig's walk is so handsomely hot and that pierce brosnan was a mistake, discussed movie in car ride home, took turns using the loo, went to macDonalds for breakfast, a lot of talking and laughing in between, cousin Y send us home afterwards, reached home, prayed fajr and sleep.

the day after was spent recovering from the lack of sleep and extreme lethargicness. but all was fun and well.

Sunday, November 2, 2008


just when i told myself no more airports, no more farewells already; i get to know another favourite cousin is flying off on the fourteenth. i am so excited for him, for whatever adventure and knowledge that awaits him there. the past august saw a lot of people that i know and love going overseas.

i think usually part of the reason that it is so sad is cause everytime i send somebody off, i feel like i'm being left behind (and quite literally too). i am thankful right now with whatever life has to offer for me here, but often it feels so suffocating.

i. cannot. breathe.

the school system here is vigorous. or maybe it is not, maybe i'm just finding excues to not do well. really, my creative juice is drying. (i want to do something i like already!) and i cannot imagine how job hunting for me would be next year, with what the economic crisis. of course i pray that it'll be better next year but you know anything can happen. i'm not saying life overseas will be smooth sailing and sweet smelling, i think i just need a little change. i don't mind going away for work or school, it doesn't matter. even for holiday maybe. i talked so much of going somewhere, anywhere, all the time that people around me probably get sick hearing (hehe sorry :D)
i have never ever experience studying abroad. the longest i've been overseas was two weeks or so. i only hear and read about people's experiences and always in awe. when do i get to have stories of my own too! i love travel. i am hungry (roaaaaar) for stories of some sort. (which reminds me, i have some pictures posted on my flickr from my short ulu langat trip.)

click picture for a bigger view. i put together four pictures any-o-how.

the thing about sending people off at the airport is you have to be prepared. in the case of like the picture above, being prepared of crowds. and be mentally prepared of course, so you don't get hysterical infront of the said crowds. it can get quite embarrasing.

and when you see people crying and hugging, it's just... i don't know. the hair at the back of my neck usually stands. a rush of emotions just pulled whatever energy i have left. then i don't hold them tears back at just let it flow. it's just much much easier. but it is draining and tiring, crying is. i cannot quite figure out what my mind is doing when i cry, what it is (i was) thinking.

yesterday i went to the airport three freaking time. i was so pro with sending people off already, no more crying. nah, not exactly. i didn't know the people well enough that's why. but that's not really true either. most of the time i can't help it... i mean when you see a mother hugging her son, closing her eyes and then her tears start to wet her cheeks... the image just reflects emotion that is just so so real and raw. you can just feel it, you know. it's like the most basic connection of all, a mother and child. so to see the two part is very wrecking. parting is such sweet sorrow.

that is why, i talk to my mum about going overseas every possible opportunity i have (hehe). i want to get her prepared, see. but she probably don't mind anyway, my mum has two other daughters. nothing to loose really.

yesterday i had visitors too. my aunts and uncle came and we were finding words to write on a birthday card to be passed to my cousin in egypt via my sister's friend who was flying off. it's funny i feel cos these are the kind of things we wouldn't normally do. who sends cards anymore? (well, i do, but not as frequent) i love whatever it is now, being distant, in a way, no matter how weird it sounds. only recently i've added loads of my cousins on my msn, i write to them, i send them cards, i think about them more. when you think about them more, you pray for them more. so that's always great. even when you're in the same place, we're all so occupied with our own little lives, we barely get to see each other anyway.

so yeah, my cousin will turned 21 soon. so we prepared cards and cookies for him. i got a little teary eyed reading his mum's message. she really chooses her words well.

of all the things, he wanted 3ply packet tissues, isn't that the weirdest request? anyway, we called him and passed around the phone and i went online and tried to make a video call. everyone, let's start using skype. msn for mac sucks.

the first is us in spore. second is my cousin; my uncle kept insisting he turn on another light because initially we couldn't see him. and yeah that's faritz in the last one. my cousin, he and others were having a study group or something. (:

going to the airport is not all teary, sad and mushy. it can be quite fun too. infact, it is almost always fun for me. the "camping" at the airport and all that.
and sending people off means meeting the other people; those people that i know but rarely see. like seeing them once in a few years, that kinda rare. like yesterday, i saw my high school classmate for the first time in nearly 3 years. i am only nineteen years young, so three years is quite a long time.

and of course, there's the post-send off treat... just to be around with family and friends are great. with farewells, you appreciate each others company more.